Toxicity in online gaming: What parents should know

Many gamers experience bullying and harassment while playing online, but a new study by media research firm Magid looks at the direct effects of bullying and harassment on gamers ages 10 to 18 providing insight on how they respond to toxic behavior. We spoke with Matt Bertz, VP of Gaming Research at Magid, about how kids are getting around toxicity in gaming and strategies they and parents can use to make online gaming a safer space.

Love the game, hate the toxicity

It’s worth noting that most kids find gaming to be an overall positive experience. Over 70% of all kids in the study view gaming positively. Despite this, online gaming has exposed many kids to toxicity, such as the aggressive, competitive language that players sometimes use during games. In the same way people can use aggressive language in social media, players can make aggressive, condescending comments during gameplay.

Nearly a quarter of young gamers in Magid’s study say they see some form of toxic behavior most of the time they play. And another study by the Anti-Defamation League found that 77% of all gamers have experienced bullying in online gaming.

“Many online spaces are inherently toxic, but that’s a culture problem—not exclusively a gaming problem,” Bertz says. “Given the pervasiveness of the issue, game developers are taking action, and there are many tools players can use to report or avoid bad actors.”

The impact on kids: More anxiety—but also more confidence

Toxicity in gaming can contribute to anxiety for kids, especially for the youngest gamers. More than 40% of kids ages 10 to 15 are worried about being harassed or bullied when gaming. Parents are even more worried, as 60% are concerned about their kids being bullied while gaming.

Despite this anxiety, the allure of gaming remains strong for kids. They still enjoy games despite certain players’ behaviors, they feel confident in how to handle bullies, and they experience an overriding fear of missing out if their friends are still playing the game.

4 ways kids are responding to toxicity in online gaming

1. Taking a break. Kids are very resilient when it comes to playing their favorite games—despite the toxicity they may have encountered. They most commonly respond to toxicity by taking a break. “Toxic behavior may turn a player off from a particular game, but we haven’t noted many instances of it cooling their interest in it entirely,” Bertz says.

2. Muting toxic players in the game. For others, they’ll simply mute, block or report the toxic players. “Games afford many different types of experiences,” Bertz says, “many of which don’t necessarily include interactions with other players.”

3. Finding a group of friends they fit in with. Kids also frequently play within their own groups. Sometimes, these groups are kids who know each other from the neighborhood or school. But kids will often find other groups online where they feel like they can fit in. Games like Apex Legends and Fortnite feature social tools that help kids find other like-minded players. “So they can have the kind of experience they’re looking for, whether it’s a casual game that prioritizes fun or an ultra-competitive match where performance matters,” Bertz says.

4. Finding another game, or another place to play. Sometimes, kids may switch games altogether to get away from toxic behavior. But they can also use platforms like Discord, where they have more control over who they interact with. “When you’re in a Discord group with friends, it can help you avoid getting exposed to verbal assaults,” Bertz says.

How to help your kids deal with toxic behavior in gaming

Knowing which games your kids are playing and familiarizing yourself with some of the games’ community safety features is a good place to start. Beyond that, PlayStation, Xbox, and Nintendo consoles all have parental control features that can help you manage your child’s gaming experience. These include time restrictions, messaging blockers, and tools for reporting abuse. There are also parental controls available on PCs. Protect Me, for example, supports hundreds of games and provides parents alerts on their children’s gaming activity.

These control features are helping parents feel safer about letting their kids play games, according to the Magid study. More than 80% of parents feel confident that they’re in control of their kids’ gaming experience.

“Take the time to set up the parameters you want in place and talk with your kids about their online experiences. And take note of how they’re interacting with others online,” Bertz says. “Parenting is the first line of defense when it comes to addressing bad behavior, and that applies to online spaces as well.”

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